I am such a crime fighter

Last week I drove my friend Jen to work.

Jen: I probably pass you everyday on the way into work

Me: I don't like to rush in the morning - I would rather enjoy my morning commute eating my bagel, drinking my coffee and listening to my pump up music.

Jen: Yeah but I hate being in traffic - it makes me cuss and drive erratically - I get road rage.

So today while I was sitting in traffic drinking my coffee and listening to Akon - I am pretty sure I saw a murderer or someone that did something to result in major blood spatter on their back plate. If I had been rushing like Jen I never would have noticed the car in front of me. The license plate had dark brown crusty stuff all over it. I am convinced it was blood. Seeing as I was afraid to make eye contact, I simply noted the fact in my mind. I looked at the car and there didn't appear to be any dents or dings so I think the person who clearly ran someone over must have moved the license plate to a different car as part of the cover up.

You see if I hadn't been taking my time waiting in traffic to go to work I would never have noticed this vehicle.

Now the next logical question would be did I report the mess of a license plate that I saw - no - because for all I know this person had a valid reason. I mean if I have a small list of people that I might tap with my car. Just a warning tap.

I would give Perez Hilton a warning tap...all the other bloggers talked about Miley's crotch - but Perez posted pictures. I think that is just wrong. I would also give Lindsey Lohan a tap with my car. She is so fucking annoying. She thinks that being nasty skinny drugged out and going to jail matters. I am so sick of Lindsey Lohan taking up spots on the superficial.com. I am tired of her boney ass. I would rather read drama from some other successful actress. Dakota Fanning hasn't flashed her cooch yet - make room for someone else Lo-ho.

This is why rushing around serves no purpose in the morning. Take your time going to work.

Missing out

So one of the hardest parts about taking a blogging vacation. I am going to call it a vacation because it feels bad to call it a forced break due to life - is that everyone has changed and some have left since then. Do these sentences even make since?

I am trying to say that alot of people have new designs, way more followers, different stories, new additions to the family. I guess I feel in some ways like a bad friend. In other ways I feel new to blogging again.

I guess it is the flow of things. I am hoping if I keep my blogging promise that in a couple weeks it will all feel normal again.

Okay so also - I used to read Misadventures of a Newlywed regularly but her blog is by invite only - if anyone is in touch with her I would love an invite. I miss her alot.

What do bloggers look like?

Has anyone else wondered what the typical blogger girl looks like? I have. I guess I picture an anthropologie girl - down to earth, and edgy, yet expensive. I imagine a nice hair cut that is slightly messy. The girl for sure has a cool car like a VW, or maybe she just bikes. I am sure she lives in a big city. If it isn't a big city it is definitely someplace like Portland or Seattle, perhaps Chicago, or somewhere in Maine.

I for sure do not fit in the mold I just described. I guess I just imagine what I am not. I have realized however, that a blogger can be anything. A blogger can be anyone who lives anywhere.

I am going to work on putting together a piece on the face of bloggers. If you read my blog and you want to be part of my project then send me a picture and I will post it along with a link back to your blog.

In the meantime keep blogging and remember when you wonder about other bloggers to look in the mirror! I am going to try!